Dear Jakey,

Today a lot of things entered my mind that I think you should know. So in no particular order:

1. Your clothes are still in the closet you used to share with Ethan. Not as many of the shirts since I had the quilt made but all your pants and sweaters and things like that. This morning I asked Ethan what he wanted to do about it and he said keep them there. And I said I was glad because I liked looking at them each morning when I got his clothes out.

2. Your Believe the Hype shirt is still in bed with me and Daddy. The skiing shirt they had to cut open on the night you died is also in bed with us. Some nights I hug them tight, some nights Daddy does and other nights they are just there with us. On Fridays, Ginger folds them and places them on top of the pillows when she makes the bed.

3. On the door of the room you shared with Ethan, there is still an E and a J hanging there. Your bed is still in there too and everyone calls it Jake’s bed.

4. The quilt of your t-shirts has a home on our couch and sometimes we all cuddle underneath it. Every day Ethan hugs the bear made from your Easter clothes and it is one of his favorites.

5. I remembered about the video we had on YouTube a while back of you walking on the LiteGait. We added it to the website and I had to re-name it. A man from the LiteGait company saw your video after we put it back up and he shared it on the LiteGait facebook page. His status was “Baby Steps lead to big gains. You will get there Jake, keep working on it!”  I love that he wrote that although it broke my heart at the same time. It just helped me remember all the different things we did with you and all the things you accomplished in your short time here. And I still think it is more than most people could ever hope for.

That is it for now. I just wanted you to have some concrete examples of just how present you are in our every day life.

With lots of love,