Dear Jakey,

So you have been in Heaven for exactly 6 months today. I don’t like it. I miss you. I am having a hard time doing much of anything today. I even forgot to send Ethan’s lunch to school with him today but at least saw it in time to get it over to him. And now I am watching the Today show which I DVR’d this morning because it is Meredith’s last day. Do you believe it Jakey? It is one of the many difficult things that I needed to adjust to when you were gone. Every morning you and I had keto and watched the Today show together. And then when Ethan woke up he would join us. It was just what we did.  And for a while after you died I couldn’t even watch it. Slowly we started watching again. And now Meredith is leaving – her last day marking 6 months since I’ve seen you. And all of this right now is too much. And I sit here having just watched them do all sorts of goodbye stuff and I can’t stop crying. I don’t know why you had to die. And I just hate it. I hate how life just keeps going and that I keep going. I love you so very much and miss you more than you can imagine little buddy. It just isn’t right without you here.