Dear Jakey,

We got home today. And of course the first we did was go see you. As we were approaching, I couldn’t help but be so sad. And it caught me off guard. I spent so much time thinking about leaving home, about going to Plum Island and being there without you. And was so anxious. The weird thing about life now is that I always forget is it takes just as much, maybe even more to adjust to returning home without you. It is like a harsh wake up call each and every time we drive back into Saratoga Springs from anywhere and we have to visit you at Greenridge. It doesn’t matter if it is a big trip or small trip. I don’t know how to really explain it other than the depth and permanence of it all just hits harder returning home. You are so missed in every singly detail of life here that there is no real getting used to it or adjusting to it. Today just solidifies that everything we do forever just requires us to move back and forth between the new reality we are forced to live in and our old reality that we just want back.

Love,

Mommy