So Jakey, I didn’t keep my daily 5 promise. Not sure what happened and I won’t make excuses but I am sorry. Miss Trish wrote you the most beautiful letter on Valentine’s Day and I wanted to write it to you but didn’t. And now I have to wait until we get back home. And you got a bunch of valentine’s at your grave which always makes me feel happy. Both of your girls were there competing for you attention 🙂

Anyways, we are in San Diego with Sarena. We flew out Friday and she came down from San Jose yesterday. We have a bunch of fun stuff planned for the next few days and then we have a few chill days in LA. I have had so many moments with you lately though and it makes me think of living out the rest of our lives without you. Early this morning Ethan came into our bed. He snuggled up against me and I could feel every move he made. It made me think of my nights with you when your head would rest on my arm and I felt every twitch and seizure. And I would squeeze you tight when you needed it and I would pray that they wouldn’t wake you. I could almost feel you next to me while I thought about it. And on the plane ride over we were watching old videos on my computer. And it is so wonderful yet so hard to watch you in them. At a certain point I just can’t wrap my head around watching you live and breathe.

I won’t let so much time go again my buddy. Know that I think about you, feel you and miss you every passing second of the day.

Love,

Mommy