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Jakes Hotel

Dear Jakey, The last few weeks, or maybe month, I have been inundated with thoughts, conversations, and different ideas about grief. I have talked more about you in the last month, and to more people, than I have in the previous few years. It is not that I didn’t talk...

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Trailer: A Place of Yes

“We are living every day with the fact that our son died, that our son who was supposed to be alive is not. There’s no easy way around that," host Heather Straughter said. Heather was 36 when her four-year-old son Jake suddenly died. She thought it would destroy her....

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Technology

Dear Jakey, I found a video today of you on an old digital Canon camera. It was quite an ordeal to get the battery charged so that I could see what was on it and then once I got the camera turned on it took me a while to figure out how to scroll through the pictures...

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Back Again

Dear Jakey, After a 7 year hiatus, I returned to writing to you earlier this month. It was done away from this blog and really gave me a chance to think about all the things that these letters meant to me and why I stopped writing. It was like dipping your toe in the...

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Saying Goodbye

Dear Jakey, Here we are again. Quickly approaching December 8th. About three weeks ago, I came to the realization that the next letter I wrote you would be my last one. With that realization came a sense of calm and resolution, yet somehow I couldn't get myself to sit...

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Anticipation

Dear Jakey, I just logged on for the first time in month to write to you. And the last time I wrote was December 7th, the day before you died. It sort of embarrasses me that this is what my letter writing has become - twice a year, on two of the hardest days. There...

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Traditions

Dear Jakey, I have been thinking lately about traditions. We have started so many since you've been gone. We come to Montreal every December to spend time and remember you away from the hoopla at home. We spend Christmas in Aruba and your birthday in Lake Placid. We...

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Lost and Found

Dear Jakey, I still get overwhelmed by the loss in the world. Some days, it seems that no matter where you look people are living in the world of grief. I don't know the degree to which I noticed it before your death. Of course, I felt the tragedy that others feel...

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Secret Fight

Dear Jakey, I feel a little like we were in a fight. Not really a real fight. More of a secret fight. You remember those don't you?  The ones I get in with people when I know that it's mostly me being annoyed by things I shouldn't be. The ones that are more a "me...

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