Dear Jakey,

Do you remember a letter I wrote you back in October? I took Ethan to Paulie’s birthday party and I was having issues about how to tell people what was wrong. I wrote about Paulie’s mom and how I liked her and thought we would be friends but I never knew when to tell her that her 4-year-old and you would probably not be fast friends. Anyways, as it turns out, she has been so kind and I was right that we would be friends. Paulie came over after school today and when she came to pick him up we chatted for like an hour and it flew by. I told her all about you. I was right about her – she is  a good friend. I wish you got to know her.

And I wanted to share with you the conversation Ethan and I had at your grave tonight. He said ” I wish you weren’t here” and I asked him what he meant. He said “I wish you weren’t dead. I wish you were here at the cemetery but just visiting someone else.” And as we were driving out, he said it again. “I wish you didn’t die”  We then went to light a candle. We decided you could see them from Heaven and know we were loving you and thinking of you.