Dear Jakey,

It is funny how things work out. We were so dreading this visit, or at least Mommy was. I hated the idea of having to go to Children’s and hated the idea of seeing Dr. Fulton. I was completly anxious and worked up and for once, it all turned out fine, it actually even turned out well. Go figure. Walking through the door at Children’s still makes me feel like puking but I am not sure that will ever change. Last night I kept wishing that I could be inside your brain and know what you were thinking about. Were you as anxious as I was? You didn’t sleep well  – maybe it was nerves, or maybe it was my nerves rubbing off on you. I suspect that is closer to the truth.

You did such a good job with all those tests though. So much testing for my little guy. Daddy did a great job keeping you positioned right for all the different tests, especially the photographs and it reminded me how strong he is for all of us. He knows when we need him the most and steps it up.

How crazy was it that they got those pictures of the back of your eye? When I was telling Ethan about it I think he was kind of jealous – and impressed when I told him that it sort of looked like a cross between the moon and mars. Anyways, it was pretty cool for me to watch you and you made me so proud, but nervous too. It was weird not being able to answer for you and have to just be quiet and let them see what you did on your own. I am not used to that. But you did great and played well with everone. 

And the best part is that you can see. You already knew that but we weren’t always sure. Although I always believed you could see some things, some of the time – not it is confirmed. The best part is that while you don’t see great, you do see and the potential to see more is there. We like ptoential and we have more information to share with all your teachers, therapists and friends to make your learning easier on you. Ethan was so excited to know for sure that you can see and got right in your face almost as if to test it out. I can’t wait until that left arm of yours gets a little stronger and you can knock him out of the way!  I hope you understood how proud we all were of you during the tests. You need to know how much we love you and how proud you made us today. I know using your eyes that long made you tired but you did everything they asked of you and it is just one more reason I know you are a rockstar.