Dear Jakey,

You will get a kick out of today. I actually did it – I finished day one of the tiling project and it came out pretty decent. It was both harder and easier than I expected. In a weird way it feels like it is one of the things that I was able to do since you left us that I actually am quite proud of and feel good about. Other things have been noticeably different and while even enjoyable, I can’t help but think about how I am able to do things now because you are gone. This felt different. Maybe because it was at home and maybe because it was just me. Maybe because it didn’t feel like I was avoiding the inevitable realization that when I got home you wouldn’t be there. Instead I was here at our house, doing something to make it better and alone with my thoughts and with you. It was pretty okay. It needs 24-36 hours before I can grout so tomorrow I will be back at it. I love you so much my little man. It is time to take your brother to Tae Kwon Do. We’ll be by to see you first. Talk soon. Much love.

XOXO

Mommy